Interesting, but I’m not sure if this is true. Formality is something that you use in the presence of someone more powerful than you, and is intended to communicate respect. You might use a formal tone with a judge, an informal tone with a child. The fact that formality is distancing is precisely what makes it respectful; for example, you shouldn’t look a king in the eye, use his first name, or treat him like another human being just like you.

Of course, the king can do those things to you, and that’s the real expression of power: other people have to be formal with you, but you can be informal with them. In modern business, the people who most experience this most frequently are not the customers, it’s the customer service representatives, the employees at the bottom of the organization whose job is to treat the customer like a king.

And what if it’s actually dangerous to humanize businesses? Apple is perceived as vulnerable, sympathetic & human, and this means customers forgive it for it’s mistakes. Is that good? Shouldn’t we hold companies responsible for their mistakes instead of giving them a break, like with friends and family?

What if you felt connected to your insurance company, and they called you to raise their rates: “Hey, it’s Friendly Neighborhood Insurance Company! So, how are you, how’s the family? Good, good! Listen, things aren’t looking so hot on our balance sheet this quarter… yeah… we are thinking we might have to let some of our people go… do you think you could pay a little extra for your insurance for the next few months? That would be really awesome, we’d totally appreciate it!”

Is that better or worse than having a formal notice come in the mail? Even though it’s friendlier, it’s not so clear. Think about all the stories of people being exploited by their friends, lovers, even con-men. It’s possible to be mislead by our desire for connection and forgive what shouldn’t be forgiven. Businesses have a massive financial incentive to exploit those weaknesses, so is it really a good idea to teach them how? The ethical problems of advertising are well known; humanizing businesses could potentially magnify this same problem.